Um. Does anyone know how to get the stink of fox poop out of dog blankets? I've washed them twice using my usual 7th Generation and some borax, but they smell like something died. Pookie really likes these blankies, so I don't really want to get rid of them, but--they cannot live here like this.

Almost all of the work for the semester for both classes is due this week. Or Monday. Yay.

I'm still having a very sad week. Tomorrow I'm getting comfort food with homies and doing art and walking Pookie and raking leaves.

Work has been very, very stressful. Not the usual kind. I'll explain if I get some spoons.

In the meantime, I've got a small story that I write in my extra cute extra smooth papered notebooks while on break. I need two things. I need a super-power and I need a fairy tale. Can someone just list some superpowers and fairytales? I heart you.

I've gotten some really sad news today. On top of some very sad news last week.

If you should have an incredibly cheerful story to tell me about, that would be good, too.

I'm having a bad pain day weekend, thus I'm waaaaay behind on comments and emails. To complicate matters, LJ is being frisky and sending me notes about some comments but not all and randomly rearranging the entries on my flist.

So, global apologies. I'm also extremely short on memory at the moment (side effect). I'll get to things soon, though. Storm should be gone soonish, and my brain shall return.

The SGA Big Bang is now open!  Over forty authors and artists have written and illustrated novels, including yours truly! 

The site is just gorgeous and full of wonderful stories. 

I suggest, of course, that you start with Know How to Fall by auburnnothenna , because it is about dressage and eventing horses and John and Rodney. And because it is awesome!  This is the story I was lucky enough to paint for!  I don't believe any prior character or fandom knowledge is necessary.  It is a warm, interesting, character focused romance and it's novel length. 

Many of these stories are AU, and I am now happily set for the weekend.

I'm thrilled that you're writing a story for me, and I'm pretty easy to please, so I know I'll enjoy your gift.  Just knowing that you crafted something for me is a great pleasure. 

If you'd like some hints and thoughts, here's a bit about why I requested things and what I love most.  Mostly I want a story based on stories that I love with the kind of unabashed glee of a twelve year old wearing a purple unicorn shirt (which I used to).  I tend to fall hard for characters who fight for what they want, and for characters for who are a tad emotionally stunted but who grow and try and learn, and most of all do for their loved ones. 

So make the characters struggle for happiness as much as you'd like.  I'm all for stretching and growing and overcoming obstacles, but I love a happy ending best. 

Some of my personal cool bits (girls who dress up as boys, gender bending, frock coats) may not fit into any of these stories.  I do enjoy a good AU, and if you suddenly decided to stick Nightworld into a Regency or put the Valdemar boys in a dark bar in a Noirville, I would likely explode in glee.  But I also dearly love canon settings and riffs on simple, understated canon facts. 

Feel free to disregard, but here are some additional cool bit favorites: long hair, nifty outfits, libraries, books, friends who fall in love, fighting together, dialog, bookshops that sell magic, dressup, disguises, alter-egos, swords, genderbending.  I love slash and I love het and I love gen. 

A few notes on some things that squick me: I don't enjoy incest or pairing rape (dub con is fine).

I just finished listening to the Hogfather.  I love that book.  Maybe I'll listen to the Fifth Elephant next.

It's time to make some decisions on how I want to use the time I've got, I think.  I'm glad things shook out, really, as it reminds me of a few fundamental principles. 

I'm looking forward to the release of SGA Big Bang, which should happen any second now.  I don't know how many here know about about it, but it's an old fashioned fandom big bang, with about fifty authors who have written novel length stories (all of which have been beta'd) that are illustrated and posted on a shiny, beautiful, easy to read website.  This will be the last SGA Big Bang and I have some art in it.  

My to-do list of the moment is quite dull.
Work--do the pile on my desk.  Exciting, eh?
Edit more of the journal.
Over lunch, perhaps fool around with some words. 
Send off a few emails.
In the evening, while on break, knit a bit. 
Complete the cataloging, the public library project, and the tax thing.
Attend class.

I did decide to sign up for Yuletide, because the stories are due after I have graduated.  Graduated.  Isn't that a nice word?  I think it's a very nice word. 

I'm insanely jealous of everyone doing Nano. 

My review of the Corel Official Painter Magazine is up over at the Hooded Utilitarian, with a special emphasis on one of my favorite painters and tutorial writers, Wen-Xi Chen. 

A friend got me to thinking about relationships.  I trimmed the old f-list today, and I paused over a name or two, I admit. 

I'm coming to the end of the long, slow haul that is graduate school for me.  I'm allllmost there.  So close I can taste it.  Also so close that I can start thinking about Life After, which is lovely, because I like having a life.  

Over the past several years, I've had some rough times.  I've gone through disability, surgery, and knee rehabiltation; I've been in rough housing situations and have needed to move on short notice.  I've had floods.  Working long hours plus papers plus helping at home plus rehab.  It's hard to believe, sometimes, especially since my particular brand of crazy is very good at slurring memory. 

All of that has meant that sometimes I haven't been a very good friend. By which, yes, of course I mean that I haven't commented often, or that I got lousy at replying when I had previously left more comments than I ever ever received.  It also means, though, that I've lost my way and not seen things clearly, or that I jumped to a conclusion or two, or that I failed to jump to the conclusions that were staring me in the face.  

What I've been contemplating isn't just my sins, though those are plenty legion.  I'm contemplating this long huge stretch of energy that is appearing before me.  Where do I want to spend that energy?  How?  And with who?

I've got some choices to make.  I was in an interesting conversation with someone about, well, nevermind the topic, it's irrelevant.  Anyway.  I said that I don't approve of self-hate and he said that he felt it had a place.  I thought about that a long time, because I hadn't really thought about why I don't like self-hate (besides my tendency to be pink and fuzzy) and I've come to realize that I don't believe in self-hate.  Yes, I mean, I believe it exists.  I just think it's a pointless waste of a good angst.  I much prefer remorse, which prods the person to do something dammit.  (Fix the wrong, avoid future wrongs, et cetera.)  You can do something with a nice dose of remorse.  But self-hate leads nowhere.

(This all has a point, I swear.)

What I've been contemplating is the nature of the change in relationships.  There's a relationship that I thought was pretty much doomed, a long while ago, and to my surprise, it is coming along just fine.  It's amazing what effort, stodgy and slow and steady--no heroics--will do.  I hadn't expected it, but it's just fine.  Not perfect, but fine.

Another relationship, one that I thought would be grand and eloquent, has withered, and I'm starting to think it's dead.

But when we talk dead, I tend to think in terms of plants.  There's dead and then there's water it with seaweed extract, stick it in good light, put it inside the greenhouse, and two months later it's fine, despite having originally lost all leaves and seeming to be a bunch of twigs. 

And yet, already healthy plants also get a huge boost from kelp extract and might go on to blossom or sprout wings or what have you.  So, it's not a simple choice to pour extra energy into the brokedy ones.  Some of my perfectly happy relationships should get some southern exposure and the nice clay pots, too. 

So, I don't know.  The relationship that I think is dead is my perception of it.  I'm pretty sure zie doesn't like me and has decided against the friendship but is too polite to say so.  My basis for this is their behavior; I've been cut from all filters, don't get comments, and so on.  When I'm not sure, I pretty much judge things on actions rather than eons past words.  Which of course also brings up the point--what do actions mean?  There are actions that I think indicate people want to be closer, or are still interested, the gestures that keep the social relationship moving.  Maybe I'm wrong--maybe they're not commenting for other reasons, maybe I'm removed from the filters for other reasons.  It's hard not feel unliked, though.  (I doubt this person is reading this, but I suppose anything is possible.)

There's a question I've also been contemplating.  Which is that when I do apply the seaweed extract, what does that look like?  More comments on silly and happy posts, more support, more emails, of course, but what else?  When someone has mutual fandoms or mutual passions, there are some ways to easily move things along.  If they want to.  Which is a trick.  How do you say to someone (who isn't a lover) that if the friendship is to survive it needs some work?  (There are plenty of other lighter friendships I have that are fine, and I'm not talking about those.)  That, frankly, it's time to fish or cut bait, you know?  That there've been some points of tension and it's now needful to either get closer or draw apart for good? 

In the real world, the flesh and bones world, I'd invite them out for some mutual activities.  Suggest we take classes or do other relationship building exercises.  But how do you suggest this to someone who you're in a brokedy friendship with online? 

I'm going to think things through more.  I've got some truly wonderful, deep and gem-like friendships that sparkle and shine.  They make me happy and fill me with joy and glee.  I want to treasure them and deepen them, so I'm thinking of the many wonderful things I'll get to do once I'm freer, once I have more time.  Some are with people who hung in there with me and were patient with my faults, and I think that I have some making up to do there, but it will be good work, work I'm looking forward to.  Some are with newer people, people I'm just getting to know and enjoying learning about, and I"m pretty damn excited about them, too. 

It's strange but vexing to me that the one I think about is the one I think that's probably dead and over.  Odd.  I need to either find a way to re-enliven it, take it out to the movies or join it in a mutual hobby, as it were, or let it go.  I'm curious what everyone thinks, especially about the potentials for deepening relationships or deciphering when they're over.

I went through and trimmed the f-list today.  I removed inactive journals and a few folks who I hadn't traded comments with in the past year or so (fine people, but we've just drifted apart).  If anyone has comments or questions, please let me know below.  Comments are screened, so an email address would be helpful if you'd like to avoid the quick unscreen/screen again bug that is LJ.

I have a luscious pair of Doc Martens red boots, size 7 UK unisex (US women's 9) boots that need a new home.  I bought them about a year ago, and I've barely worn them because they're too big.  (Supposedly I needed this big insole that would make me need a size larger, but it turned out not to work that way.)

Thus, I am selling them.  They retail for 117 these days, US, so I thought a fair price would be 50 dollars.  Basically never worn.  They are not the cherry red with the black trim, or the red patent, but this smooth and silky darker creamy red on lush leather.  I got them straight from Doc Martens. 



The price includes US shipping, but if you are elsewhere in the world and would like them, please add 10 dollars. 

I just paid my graduation fee!  Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!

I am cleaning out my shelves and things and removing some stuff I don't plan to reread.

My local bookstores do not offer reasonable prices for books, and selling them this way always depresses me.  (I usually get ten dollars per every three bags full, even manga.)  I was going to take these to my local library, but their hours are weird, so.

I'm offering these books here, with the following stipulation: I'm not listing individual titles, it's too much work.  I am offering these by the box, and they may contain any and all of the following: novels (YA and fantasy and romance and who knows what), manga (random and some yaoi), non-fiction (cooking, gardening, art, dogs), and whatever else I happen to have but no longer plan to read again.  There might also be some high end fashion magazines, like Zink.  It's hard to say.  You can do whatever you'd like with them, such as read and donate, or read and sell, or if you find they're not to your taste, just sell.  Whatever.  They're yours, no strings.

There are about four boxes worth.  Perhaps more.

Comment with your address and an email if you would like a box or two of random books.  Comments are screened.

Books are now gone!  Sorry!

I was sitting outside, preparing to draw a bit out there because it is insanely beautiful (70, sunny, breezy and fall smelling), while the Pookie waited patiently for his oatmeal to cool.  Pookie gets oatmeal at every meal to help his IBD and it is his favorite food.  He prefers it even to meat.  Yes, weird.  So I'm sitting there and he's harrumphing quietly to himself about the Slowness of Humans when there's a quick little breeze and a pile of leaves dumps on my head from the roof above.  I look up, startled, and look around, and find the Pookie, laughing his ass off at me, tongue lolling and eyes twinkling. 

Some people say animals have no advanced emotions.  Don't you believe it.

I brushed off the leaves, collected my dignity, and put his oatmeal to cool in the freezer so it would be done faster.  Seemed only fair.

I'm really resenting my classes right now.  Public libraries sucks when it could be fun, and I want to be spending those spare hours writing Nano.  Or at least cleaning up chat writing transcripts.  I don't really want to play in Yuletide, because there just seems so much wank around it these days.  If I did play, it would probably be fandoms I shouldn't write.  Like Lackey's Valdemar.

I've got about eight inches on a cabled scarf, which I started just to give my hands something to do.  A lot of cable knitting patterns seem to suck.  I'm not sure why.  I've started several projects and had to frog them because the knitting curled, went weird, had wrong directions, or similar.  Odd.

I would like there not to be fox poop on my favorite boots.

To a dear, cool person, Faith Hope and Tricks (faithhopetricks !

May you have a very merry birthday, my dear, with lots of yummy chocolate cake and kitty snorgling!  And BOOKS!

My essay on race in modern American comics is up over at Hooded Utilitarian. 

I'm stuck in this terrible public libraries class (even worse than last semester's research methods).  I hate it.  It's not that much work, because the prof keeps canceling assignments (so she doesn't have to grade them, I suspect), but it's still plenty of work.  (I am still refusing to read the twenty year old textbook, because it is worthless and wrong).  Anyway.  As you can see, I'm having a hard time and a terrible case of senioritis.  Do not want to work--

At all.

Cataloging, while satisfying intellectually, is also really really hard.  Categorize the entire intellectual output of all of human history--and don't forget the future!

So I'm paying myself to study.  Yes, I know some people think that learning should be its own reward, but have they sat in on three three hour long classes covering public library trustees?  I think not. 

So I'm paying myself in yarn and possibly sweaters and or Vosges truffles. 
Superwash Tweed.
Sublime Cashmere Merino (a scarf for me!! Shocking idea, I know)
Cashmerino
More Palace
More Waterlily
And some Ariosa

Which isn't even addressing Knit Picks.  Oh, Knit Picks and your tempting ways!  How I long for the pretty gray and black tote.  The Harmony straights set.  The complete 6" DPNS.  *sigh*  More of the lush Swish worsted and the pretty but indulgent

Wait!  Despite my insanely beautiful stash, I could probably indulge.  If I earned it. 

I thought about minimum (7.25) but that's too low.  So I have chosen instead to make it 10.  *sigh*  *peers at pretty yarns*  Another project, another ball of yarn.  It's time to get to work.  

Wool of the Andes Bulky
I love this yarn.  It is quite a change from my usual yarns (I am heavily into silk-cashmere-merino blends and merino superwash).  The wool is Peruvian Highland, quite a bit sproingier and heavier than my usual yarn. 

The feel of this wool is very strong and sturdy.  It squishes, but springs back very strong.  I think it feels exactly like a thicker, bulky version of Cascade 220.  A real wool's wool.

I've thus far knitted a scarf in it, and I find it has excellent stitch definition, although it is not shiny, the way some wool is.  It feels good to the hand and has a ton of bounce back.  It's a good knit to experiment new stitches with, as it is pretty forgiving. 

One thing I'm not used to is that this yarn will felt easily.  I often stuff my knitting into my bag, willy nilly, and the long unwoven-in ends have started to felt a bit, just from banging around in my bag.  That's a feature/flaw, depending on your project. 

Note that this yarn also comes in hand dyed colors (I love the cherry cordial!) and undyed, so you can dye your own. 

I'm sorry to say that this one really didn't work for me.  I listened to about half of it and finally gave up.  It's just not very good, many of the characters behave weirdly (Vetinari talks and talks and talks), and the main threads of the story don't work together. 

It's just weird.  There are small places where the story is good, in small snatches, but overall, it's rather a rehash of better older Pratchett.  It's not bad, but it's not very good, either.

I would say more of what bothered me, but I feel kind of bad saying as much as I already have.  I had a similar reaction to Making Money, despite adoring Moist Von Lipwig.  It was just--off.  This story is even more off.  I realize that Pratchett is fighting an illness, which is partly why I don't really want to say more than, Well, it isn't very good.  It's working for some people, though, so you may try it and find you like it just fine.